Too Much Nick

(via justin)

This is how Rachel heats up the last of her coffee.

In her defense, it is a bitch to, like, pour it into a pot and pour it back into a cup.

She tells me, “I’m sorry I can’t be the domestic goddess that you are, Nick Douglas.”

The Alexa bot musta been logged into his personal account.

funsizebytes:

alinasmith:

Office Depot has a deal on 4 packs of 250 Full-Color Raised Print business bards. To take advantage of the deal, apply this code: 71968582 then this code: 16400993. The whole thing should come out to $3, shipped.

I believe these codes are only good today, but I could be wrong.

If you make a thousand cards that just say “You’re awesome.” and randomly hand them all out to people on the street, I will send you a signed original polaroid.

Not kidding. You’ll need to figure out some sort of way of providing me with proof…but I’m totally serious.

Finally, someone has come up with a way to synergize Shakespeare and the business world…

UPDATE: I went through and it comes to ($29.99 - $10.00) - 15% = $16.99. Not a bad price, but not $3.

You have to get four packs. Worked for me.

Holy shit, I just paid $3.67 for a thousand business cards. I really hope I don’t come to regret the cocky job title I gave myself.

Hey look, someone caught Jason Bateman halfway through morphing into Kathleen Turner! [io9]

sexpigeon:

This uncertainty might stand as a hallmark of failed art.

Okay, now is this one from 2007 more offensive or less offensive? (Either way the Scholastic guy makes it HILARS)

Four kids name several Lego pieces. Scroll down the the chart.

By me.

Okay, part of my schtick is I never get offended. So how am I the only one who actually thinks this Onion video goes too far?

UPDATE: No, the girl in the story isn’t real. I’m gonna pretend those of you who assumed I was talking about her are just being very clever.