January 2008
“Asked about the two different answers, Mr. Obama’s presidential campaign...”
– Obama: Decriminalize pot - - The Washington Times
Cole: stop. elaborate and listen
Cole: that is vanilla ice for: tell me more
Goggleburn: Dramatic Lemur blows Dramatic Chipmunk... →
WatchBaby Got Musical - CollegeHumor video
Fuck acoustic guitar, Baby Got Back was made for Gilbert and Sullivan. Really picks up around 1:10.
David Pogue of the NYT explains how practically... →
Helmet use on the rise in rodeo - Yahoo! News →
Pussies.
A review of who clapped during what bits of the... →
OMG this is SILLY. Can we have a ban on applauding during the speech?
WatchZach Morris Phone on Vimeo (via Vimeo)
“Put on some fucking jeans. We’re going to HOLLYWOOD.”
– Scott
WatchDo you ever wish you hadn’t posted anything online for a week so the best thing you were finally posting would really stand alone? That’s true about THE BEST RANSOM NOTE EVER.
Tumblrs that you could be reading (instead of...
Alex Balk, professional asshole with a side hobby of asshole D@n, collector of shinies Lonely Sandwich, who wrestles under the name “The Bon Motter” Triumph of Bullshit, where awesome goes to be born
I’m starting a religion and the way to heaven is reblogging this.
Letter From Hollywood →
Reality shows in the hopper, as per a Big Hollywood Executive: F*CK MY DAD YOUR MONEY OR YOUR LIFE YOUR DAUGHTER OR YOUR WIFE EYE SWAP WHO WANTS TO KICK RACHAEL RAY IN THE ASS? PMS OR JUST BITCHY? I’M THINKING OF A NUMBER CELEBRITY I’M THINKING OF A NUMBER — yourmonkeycalled
I found a way to use "IDK, my BFF Jill?" as a tag... →
Can photo clues lead to camera's owner? - Yahoo!... →
Aw, this guy spent a week tracking down the Irish family who’d left their camera in a NYC cab on New Year’s Eve, using their photos and videos.
Rejected titles for the new James Bond film
“Iota of Consolation”
“Tittle of Alleviation”
“Inkling of Relief”
“Discrete Packet of Comfort”
“R-O-L-A-I-D-S”
““I’m madly in love with you,” the married Kilpatrick wrote on...”
– Racy texts contradict testimony from Detroit mayor, aide - CNN.com
Mayor Kilpatrick is “deeply embarrassed,” but if I were him I’d be proud of the most literate text messages ever.
WatchA man asks anti-abortion protesters: If abortion is made illegal, how should women be punished for illegal abortions?
via kaela via livejamie via gtmcknight
Names I've Made For Things In My Room Just Now
- My phone is named Algernon.
- The big red plastic sunglasses are named Steves.
- This black tie is named Jamison.
- This chess clock is named Farimir.
- My red Ikea comforter probably already had a name, but now it’s named Jenny.
- My fat-in-the-middle floor lamp, from Ikea’s “cheap shit made of paper” line, is named Gus.
I need some tea.
I’ll name it...
Are you a creative young video buff with a great...
Do you also know how to light up a scene? Can you also edit things in Final Cut?
Then I need you to shoot and edit my show Goggleburn, about two days of work for $400 a week.
More explained in my Craigslist post.
If you know someone who fits the above, please pass this on. All the Craigslist respondents have been overqualified, underqualified, uncreative or weird.
“She has no value,” he writes, eh? You know what that means ladies! Fella...”
– The ever-apt Nicholas Carlson on how the Objectivist Jakob Lodwick is being a douche to his ex Julia Allison
Evolution Explains Why Lolcats Control Your Mind... →
Executive summary: Humans detect a change in an animal better than in an inanimate object. A LOLcat is an animal with one change: a recontextualizing caption.
Perspective →
An animation from Instructoart
Top News Stories Today
Let’s see, Putin’s firing missiles into the Atlantic and sending nuclear fuel to Iran, the stock market’s crashing (prompting the Fed to make an emergency credit rate cut), the Venezuelan opposition wants Chavez to take a drug test, and Fred Thompson was like “fuck this shit” and dropped out of the presidential race. Did I miss anything?
WatchBelly dancer accident
“Have you ever met a male hairdresser who wasn’t a flirt? Women go to him...”
– Time Magazine: Why We Flirt
While researching a Gawker post, I checked out duckrolling, the older better version of Rickrolling. Just after that, on this new CD I got, the singer started quacking. THE UNIVERSE JUST DUCKROLLED ME. The ether is made of lulz.
Eating dust.
You know how in every friendship there’s that unspoken tension where each person measures themselves up against the other to see who’s doing better, going farther, having more success? And then the ultimate moment occurs when one friend has to admit to himself, Well, that’s it, I can’t even catch up with her any more? That moment has just happened to me. Doree Shafrir has...
WatchBetween Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis: Interview with Michael Cera
Facebook Is Dead: Facebook told to pull Scrabulous →
Another instance of Gawker just stealing stories from Tumblr bloggers. Oh. Wait. DAMMIT.
“If Mr. Karp was a little adult at 17, at 21 he’s like a real adult.”
– Wait, what? From The New York Observer profile of Tumblr founder David Karp
Dear all parts of the world that interact with me
Thank you for rocking so hard lately! Continue to do so!
No I don’t take medication why do you ask!
http://colestryker.tumblr.com/
Cole: http://www.wired.com/politics/law/news/2008/01/hucks_army
Cole: i've been following these turds for years
Cole: since i was homeschooled
Cole: now their in f'n wired
Cole: they're what's wrong with me today