"Is there a bifurcation of self?- is there, can there be, a self that exists outside of the writing? Can you really put yourself, your truth, into something and then say it isn’t you? And why do we ask that of them?"
—
Yes.
Because the present me is horribly different from the past me (which is why I’m glad I torched my old blogs and retain the barest scraps of old journals), the future me will be horribly different from the present me (and I already resent him and he will resent me for all the things I do wrong now, some of which I should know are wrong and some of which I shouldn’t, and which is worse deserves its own essay), and one of the ways that future me will preserve my superiority over (or at least difference from) present me is to renounce my connection with my present writing.
Like, by tomorrow I’ll regret intentionally obfuscating my tenses.
THE ME THAT IS WRITING THIS SENTENCE WOULD LIKE TO REJECT THE PAST SENTENCE AS A FURTHER EXAMPLE OF PAST ME’S INFERIORITY.
THE ME THAT IS WRITING THIS SENTENCE HATES THE SELF-REFERENTIALITY OF THE PAST SENTENCE BUT WILL INDULGE IN PAST ME’S LITTLE GAME ONLY TO NOTE THAT THIS IS GETTING NEEDLESSLY DERIVATIVE OF SOMETHING BETTER BY STEVE MARTIN, PROBABLY IN “PURE DRIVEL” BUT MAYBE IN “CRUEL SHOES.”
I’m still serious about the bit that wasn’t in caps though.
